I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
either way he was missing a nipple.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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