sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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