It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
