Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
