I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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