What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
