i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
