he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
