She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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