I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
