too bad you live with your parents still
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
