You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
my sisters under your porch take her home
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
