I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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