she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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