Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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