all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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