And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
