Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
