She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
