yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
