Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
