If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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