there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
