She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize