doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
