No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
