You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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