xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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