i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
