Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
