Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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