How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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