What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize