I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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