i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
