Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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