Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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