your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Randomize
