he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
