You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize