Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
