just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Why can't burritos get me drunk
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
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