3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize