Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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