i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
i now understand why vodka
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
