Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize