i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
not ubering you a puppy
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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