the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
