i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
