we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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